Other Voices / Our Take, Posts from Dr Beth, Women's Toolbox

The 15% Ceiling

The new glass ceiling is what we call the 15% ceiling. This is what you should be watching for. Women in only 15% of leadership roles does not change the decision-making culture in an organization.

Often these are the extraordinary superstars – brilliant women who have managed to succeed against all odds. This number of 15% occurs over and over again in major institutions. From non-profit foundations with assets over $50M, to major symphony orchestras, to Deans of medical schools, to percentage of songs heard on Country and Western radio, the 15% recurs over and over again as the upper limit for women. What is going on with this mysterious number?

In the bad old days of the 1950’s, no women were allowed as decision makers in major public institutions. Neither Sandra Day O’Connor nor Ruth Bader Ginsberg were even offered jobs when they graduated at the top of their classes from law school. Ostracism was 100% and out in the open.

In the modern era, systemic cultural sexism is still ostracizing women but the exclusion is more subtle. Little boys learn a “boy culture” way of making decisions and determining who will be the leader in the group. This historically has led to men forming what we call man forts. These are all male elite decision-making teams which have been the benchmarked norm for organizations.

These teams are portrayed as normal and fair for organizations when in reality they have a very particular culture based on pure male participation – the man fort. And misogyny is intrinsic to a man fort. Misogyny is a misunderstood word. It is not the hatred of women but is the hatred of women doing what men do. Mixed gender teams, decision making by both men and women, are the future of our country.

At only 15 % of women on a team, this is still a man fort, not a true mixed gender team where women will really be heard and function as leaders. At 15% the men still do not have to listen to women who can be ignored without consequence. At 15% the decision-making culture, which inherently ostracizes and minimizes women, does not have to change.

At 40% it does.

Whole organizations can be misogynistic or departments can be equally bad. Each department needs the right mix to make a mixed gender team.

The push is not just for top women or a few women, the push is to have enough women to make women a seamless and integral part of the decision-making team. Keep an eye on the number of women in leadership roles. That is the real tell.

Other Voices / Our Take, Posts from Dr Beth, Women's Toolbox

A Caring Boys Team

Catherine Pearson, a senior reporter at the Huffington Post, is dedicated to raising an emotionally aware and kind son. She cites a number of other modern authors who are on the same mission. The waning patriarchal culture that is still with us is making polar opposites of little girls and little boys – to the detriment of both.

Little girls are fighting to be admired for being strong and stoic as well as admired for being emotional. Little boys are fighting for their emotional lives while only being admired for being strong and stoic. We need humans (whether boys or girls) who are both.

Pearson is right that parents have a great impact, but the little boy peer group is what eventually pulls boys into the stereotyped emotionally crippled behaviors; parents are only part of the influence. It is when little boys are shamed for “acting like a girl” by other little boys that they rapidly learn they won’t be a part of the boys’ team as kids or when they grow up. We play as a matter of course with our same sex teams and this reinforces the stereotypes.

Parents might consider another tack.

Look into starting a parenting group with parents of other little boys. See if as parents you can agree on wanting both dimensions for your sons. If the boys form a natural playgroup, have them do activities that involve caregiving. Have them volunteer at an animal shelter. Brainstorm and seek out caregiving opportunities. See if you can’t get peer momentum.

You might expand this parenting dialogue to parents of girls. Our modern society is going to demand mixed gender teams. At work and at home men and women are going to be partnering and sharing caregiving and decision making.

The greatest gift you could give your young people is an appreciation of themselves as loving and strong people first. These children need to believe they will be accepted by peers if they behave that way. Parent teams can create a new world for boys and girls.

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How To Raise Kind And Affectionate Sons

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-to-raise-kind-and-affectionate-sons_l_5fad5992c5b635e9de9fdbf5